9 Effective Ways to Boost Your Child's Self-Esteem
Hey there, parents! Licensed therapist Roya Dedeaux here, once again ready with the unsolicited parenting advice :D (Hey, I can't do it during sessions, so I need to get it out somewhere) Today we are talking specifically about boosting your kid's self-esteem!
One of the most common reasons clients come to me is because of anxiety. Anxiety that prevents your kids from doing things they want to do. Things they'd enjoy. Things that would be good for them.
Have you ever looked at your kid and known they'd enjoy an activity, but they doubt their own capabilities, so they don't even try? I think that's one of the hardest things about being a parent -- watching your own kid doubt themselves, and not knowing how to help boost their self-confidence.
So here you go my parenting peeps -
9 effective ways to boost your child's self-esteem.
1. Embrace Your Inner Cheerleader
Okay, parents, it's time to channel your inner cheerleader! Put on that glittery pom-pom hat and be their number one fan. Support your child's dreams, no matter how wild or strange they may seem. This means supporting them in whatever their interests are - speaking proudly of their accomplishments, whatever they are. You don't get to cheer louder for soccer than for Minecraft. Cheer for all their interests.
2. Teach Them the Art of Sassy Comebacks
Life is full of critics, so why not equip your child with some sassy comebacks? There is something really powerful about lightly dismissing criticism. Water off a duck's back, and all that. Teach them the power of wit and humor when faced with negative comments or bullies. That outer voice will become their inner voice - even when the critic is their own self-doubt.
3. Encourage Their Inner Weirdo
Please do the work necessary to put aside your own thoughts of what your child is "supposed" to be like, do, or behave like. Embrace your child's uniqueness and celebrate their quirks. Encourage them to express their individuality and explore their interests, no matter how unconventional. Remember, the world needs more people who are unafraid to be themselves - and your early support of their unique qualities is what turns into their self-confidence later!
Building Self-Confidence in your Kids
How to turn "I can't" into "I can"
30 minute parenting webinar
4. Turn Failures into Epic Adventures
Life is full of failures, but that doesn't mean they have to be a downer. Teach your child to see failures as epic adventures rather than soul-crushing moments. Help them learn from their mistakes and embrace the idea that failure is just a stepping stone to success. If this is hard to do out in the world, try some process art! Make crafty failures on purpose and see what you can do with them.
5. Shower Them with Specific Compliments
Forget the traditional compliments with boring adjectives. Get creative and specific with your commentary. Let them know you notice how they persevered during that game, how they handled a difficult situation with grace, and how you appreciated their creative approach to that other thing that happened. Giving specifics about their wonderful qualities gives you more credibility and the compliment more oomph!
6. Level Up
Play video games! Seriously! Video games are one of the most sure-fire places to practice all the qualities we need to boost self esteem: putting in lots of time to accomplish a goal, using resources effectively, failing and trying over and over again, pride and joy in successes!
7. Make Failure a Family Tradition
Let's make failure a family tradition worth celebrating! Share your own stories of failures and setbacks with your child. By normalizing failure and showing them that even adults make mistakes, you'll teach them resilience and the value of perseverance. Make sure you are honest with what qualities you see in them that will help them overcome future failures as well.
8. Give Them a Superhero Alter Ego
Every child needs a superhero alter ego! Help your little one create a fun and imaginative persona that embodies their strengths and values. Whether they become Captain Courage or a magical dragon creature, this alter ego will empower them to face challenges with confidence and bravery. Put it on paper - make art with this persona in mind. Help them connect the dots between the alter ego and their day to day self.
9. Start a Confidence Jar
Boost your child's self-esteem with a confidence jar. Fill it with colorful notes highlighting their achievements, positive traits, and moments of pride. Whenever they need a confidence boost, they can reach into the jar and read these uplifting reminders. It's like a magic potion of self-esteem! The more specific they are, the better. Added points if they contribute a few of their own.
BONUS 10. Get even more tools!
Want more help boosting your kid's self esteem?
30 Minute Parenting Webinar
designed to Boost Your Kid's Self Esteem
by licensed therapist Roya Dedeaux
Turn "I Can't" into "I Can!"
30 minutes of creative & concrete solutions for parents of kids of all ages.
Enjoy your kiddos, and let me know if you use any of these tools!
Roya Dedeaux is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with a focus on using creative tools like art, writing, and recreation as a way to help teens and their families who don't quite fit the mold.
Roya’s first book, Connect with Courage: practical ways to release fear and find joy in the places your kids take you is the result of her background in Recreation and Leisure Studies and Marriage and Family Therapy and is the base of her Connect with Courage Parenting Course.
She loves running her private practice, creating art prompts for her
two online art groups, and running games and challenges in the
free Recreate Parenting Facebook community! When she's not doing that, she loves to make messes with her three wild & wonderful kids where they live and play hard in Southern California.
Connect With Courage
